My youngest daughter (who is 21) is staying with my oldest daughter (who is almost 23) in Columbus, OH for a summer internship.

Columbus isn’t a HUGE city, but for a young adult not used to navigating city roads, it can feel HUGE.

She left 30 minutes early on her first day of reporting to the office, but found herself lost, confused, and befuddled trying to find the parking garage with just mere minutes before she was “late”–on her very first day.

She called me crying and hysterical. This is her mode of operation when something doesn’t quite go her way. When she gets like this, she isn’t open to new ideas and suggestions. She just gets angrier.

I tried to reassure her that everything will work out; that’s it’s probably not uncommon for young, new interns to struggle finding their way on their first day, but she didn’t really want to hear that.

She eventually did figure it all out, and her day resumed.

Until she went to a local mall.

That’s when, while trying to have dinner out with my husband, I started getting texts and FaceTime calls from BOTH daughters.

Turns out, my 21 year old couldn’t find her car, and assumed it had be towed or stolen.

Talk about being hysterical…this was a repeat of the morning’s hysterics times 10.

My oldest daughter tried to tell my youngest daughter that her car was probably not towed; they don’t do that at that mall unless you are parked illegally.

My husband tried to tell my youngest daughter that her car was probably not stolen; it has anti-theft mechanisms that won’t allow the car to start without the key.

We all tried to tell her that maybe she just forgot where she parked, and maybe she just needs to walk around to find it.

“I KNOW WHERE I PARKED!!! I AM NOT STUPID!!!!” was her repeated response.

They called security. My oldest daughter drove to the mall. My youngest daughter continued to melt down. And I’m 1,000 miles away (we are in Florida) wondering how on earth we were going to provide her with another car if it was indeed stolen.

Turns out, she DID forget where she was parked, and all of the hysterics were for naught.

Talk about eating humble pie! LOL!

I share this story to highlight 3 things:

1. When my youngest daughter was in the throes of her hysterics, she said to me, “I was just trying to buy some new clothes for my new job” and “As soon as I get money, it gets taken away.” Pity party. Victim-mindset. And this prevented her from thinking that maybe tragedy didn’t befall her; maybe it was a case of forgetting where you parked. Her mindset clouded her perspective. She was sure it had to be the worst-case scenario for her because she sees herself as a victim. Someone who always has bad things happen.
2. Because she immediately launched into hysterics, she was unable to open up to new ideas about her next steps. She was resistant to calling the police (in case it was actually stolen), to calling security, and to looking around the mall. She just wanted to cry and yell. She became angry and not-so-nice to those trying to assist her (her sister and myself). Had she simmered down, the crisis could have been avoided altogether.
3. My lack mindset around money sent me into a panic too. Immediately, my thoughts went to: one more financial demand. My mindset also had me thinking worst-case scenario which totally put a damper on my evening out. It raised my stress level and even touched on my own victim-mindset thinking. Had I checked in with my thoughts, I would have had less stress and I would have handled my daughter’s hysterics better.

This is why the stories we tell ourselves about ourselves (our mindsets) matter.

Our mindsets dictate how we see the circumstances in our lives. They dictate how we feel and how we act. They control the results we have in our lives.

We filter EVERYTHING through our mindsets.

My daughter took the circumstance of her missing car, ran it though her victim mindset, and determined that the car had been towed or stolen. No other option was available because of the stories she tells herself about herself.

Mindsets can be hard to change because we don’t always have an awareness of them.

We take every thought to be true. We haven’t learned to see our thoughts, to question our thoughts, and to choose our thoughts intentionally.

I help my clients SEE their lives differently by teaching them how to SEE how they are thinking and to SEE how that thinking is impacting their lives. I then empower my clients to change the thinking that doesn’t serve them.

I help my clients process the circumstances in their lives and the emotions they are feeling so that they can take the action they desire to take.

I help my clients transform their lives from the inside out.

I have client openings for the month of June. Click HERE to schedule a FREE 60 minute consultation where we can chat about what’s going on for you, how you’d like things to be, and how I can help.